Traditions, The Stuff of Memories

Today, I am over at Canada Moms Blog talking about holiday traditions. And in a way, thanking my Mom for all the hard work she has always put into the holidays. It only took me thirty five and half years, better late than never, right Mom?

And yes, I am already dreaming of Nanaimo Bar, in fact I am counting the days until that first delectible bit. It's all about the chocolate for me.

What is the one favourite holiday tradition you and your family have?

Why I "Gave Up" My Career

Some of you likely know that by trade, I am a Chartered Accountant or CA for short. I was recently asked by another CA why I worked so hard to obtain my CA designation (16 hour exam over four days!) if I knew I was going to "give it all up" to have kids. This CA is a mother, but also a partner at a large accounting firm. She and I are not only not on the same page, we are not even in the same book. To clarify, both are legitimate books, neither one better or more valid than the other, simply different.

I stumbled over my response. It's complicated. It's not as simple as "giving up my career". For one, I haven't given up my profession. I still work as a CA, just not in the same capacity as she does. I was not offended by this question, though you might expect I would be. Because, when it comes down to it, in a sense, I have given up, temporarily and maybe permanently, a "career" as a CA.

I know of this career. I had begun this career before we had children. Barely, granted, since I got pregnant with Jack the week after the above mentioned 16 hour exam. We don't waste time. Such a career requires hard work and long hours. It requires climbing the corporate ladder. It requires assuming more and more responsibility. Not like any other career, I imagine.

In essence, it requires everything that I am not. I am not, by nature, a corporate ladder climber. That whole genre does not fulfill me even a little bit. I admire people who are fulfilled by this but I am not one of them. I think, and I am only speculating, that some are driven by the lure of making more and more money to buy more and more stuff. Maybe this is because I can't understand the alternative. That someone would be excited and energized to move up the corporate ladder. I don't know. What I do know is that neither of these things drive or motivate me.

When Jack was 18 months old, I went back to work. I had quit my job before he was a year old because I just couldn't fathom leaving him for 40 plus hours a week with someone else. Again, this is how I felt. I don't judge others who do leave their kids to work. It's a personal choice and ofter not a choice at all, but a necessity. For Jay and I, it didn't feel right. I also know that I am extremely lucky that Jay and I share these same beliefs and values and that we have this option.

However, after spending the next six months with little or no social contact (I had not yet discovered the internet, obviously), I needed to go back. It had nothing to do with wanting to further my career. It was simply a survival decision.

Jack loathed daycare. I loathed leaving him there. I didn't enjoy my work. I enjoyed the social aspect yes, but that was about it. I only worked three days a week. Frankly, in hindsight, it was three days too many. This arrangement lasted 18 months until my maternity leave began for Kamden. I never went back.

While on leave, the work I do now was mentioned as a possibility by another mom. I am indebted to her for the idea and for pushing me to try it. I have never looked back. I now teach online courses (among other things) to students who are working towards becoming CAs. I am still in the profession. In a way, I am giving back to the profession far more than I ever would have working in industry or public practice. But the biggest perk, the one that motivated me to try this in the first place, is that I am the one with our boys. I wake up with them every morning, feed them breakfast and send them off to school. Minus the "hurry up, Mommy is going to be late for work" rants. I am here when they come home for lunch. I am here when they come home from school. I was the one who dropped them off and picked them up from preschool.

I was here. I am still here.

And for that reason, I don't feel like I have given anything up at all.

Rather, that I have accumulated a lifetime's supply of riches.

Pride for my boy

Jack recently had an assignment at school the required him to list his likes and dislikes. I found my heart swelling with pride and also laughing out loud a little. Random Halloween photos are mixed in, just for fun, but in case you were looking for relevance to the post, go no further. There isn't any.



Here's a sample:

Eight things he really likes are:

- playing with my brother (yes, that got an out loud awwwwww)
- having my friend over
- going over to my friend's house
- Bon Jovi music (he's got good taste, no?)
- movie night (Friday nights are movie night at our house)

First of all, I want to just give a shout out that none of his favourite "things" are objects or toys or other possessions. Instead they are doing things with people he cares about. And playing with his brother is #1? Well if my heart didn't about break with pride upon reading that.



Now for the dislikes, don't worry it's short:

- Jazz music (seriously, he's 8, does he even know what Jazz music is? *insert laugh out loud here*)
- winter (hmm, I think I get where the Jazz music dislike is coming from...perhaps maybe, just maybe he's heard me disclose my dislike for it but winter, never. I love winter. *insert evil laugh here*)



Or evil Dr. Jay performing Jack-O-Lantern's lobotamy.

He's quite the kid, our Jack (not to be confused with Jack-O-Lantern, he is definitely not our kid), and we wouldn't have it any other way.

My hair and my camera, what a combo

Way back in August, I posted about how I wanted to do something drastic to my hair. It was not on my good side. The concencus was to but it a bit shorter but keep the same general style. You all confirmed my gut insticts and kept that voice inside that was screaming, "Shave it off!" to a dull roar.

I did exactly that and I HATED it. The bangs and the length were nothing but wrong. That voice mentioned above took it up seven octaves. I had the razor poised. Then, in last ditch effort to keep my husband and kids happy - they all love my long hair, cut from the same cloth they all are- I attempted an intervention on my bangs using a technique I saw somewhere that has since disappeared into the deep vortex that is the internet.

It was fabulous and I so wish I could find it. My hair stylist laughed her butt off after her complimenting me on my bangs, her admitting she did not cut them like that, and me telling her I used a tutorial on the internet to do it. She was all, "They show you how to cut your hair on the iternet!!!?" She has no idea what is on the internet, clearly, but she's awesome so I forgive her innocence.

Anywho, fast forward a couple of months and my hair has smartened up. It was frighted by all the razor talk I am certain. Since it's finally cooperating and I was sick to death of my the profile picture I have been using here since February 2008, I decided to attempt a new one.

Armed with my new tripod (YIPEE) and the natural light from the living room windows, here is the result.



I have newly acquired Adobe Photoshop Elements 8.0 but damn if I know how to use it. As such, the above photo is straight out of the camera. Don't look too close at my less than perfect skin now, you hear. Also keep in mind it got shrunk down to a 48 by 48 pixel square for use as my avitar for various on-line applications.

Also sorry about the burning of your retinas.

Anyway, this long and rambling post about my hair (damn, I am deep) was all to say think you for you spectacular advice. So THANKS!

My Blog in Print

Ever since I started blogging I have wondered how I could preserve what I write here long term. Let's face it, the Internet is likely to gone the way of eight tracks by the time our kids are grown. I knew I couldn't just save them in electronic form, computers and the software they run are obsolete faster than I can inhale a small chocolate bar (oh what I would give for a chocolate bar followed by a Carmel latte chaser right now - the elimination diet is not going well can you tell?).

I did a post about this about this very issue back in June. Some suggested Shutterfly where you can make a fancy photo book including your blog posts. I started that and realized it would take me hundreds of hours to make it worth anything and frankly, for the amount they may get read, it just wasn't worth my time. Also, the lack of patience I possess would have had me rocking in the fetal position suckling a bottle of vodka like a newborn partway through my posts from 2006, also the year I began this here blog.

Then someone pointed me to Blog 2 Print. I remember who but if it was you I am laying a great big wet smack on your cheek right now. That ought keep anyone from fessing up, no?

This service, well let's just say it's the next best thing since sliced bread. It pulls it all together FOR YOU. All you do is give your URL and specify the dates for the posts to pull and it spits this out to you, mailed right to your door.



Now, I can't lie, it wasn't that easy. I decided that I wanted to separate posts about the boys from posts about me. To remove the posts I didn't want pulled into the book I just went through and unpublished all the posts I didn't want - don't worry, they are not gone, merely saved as draft to be re posted at a later date. I made a book for each year except for 2007 which I split into two books because there were too many photos. The first one came in the mail the other day and it's pretty neat to have a book to flip through.

It allows me ample opportunity to reminisce over my little baby boys. They were aged five and two in 2006 and ever so wee compared to now. And then I cringe over the hideous "writing" and the overuse of smiley faces and exclamation points. They grow physically, emotionally and intellectually, my writing has grown (I think). We'll call it even.

I am very happy with this book and the 2007 and 2008 ones are being shipped shortly. I will then begin the process of republishing posts about me and unpublishing those about the boys so I can have my very own narcissistic book titled "1 2 3 All About Me". It will be handy when I am old and have no memory. I can read about this crazy woman who overused exclamation points with two adorable boys and had hormonal issues. I can't hardly wait.

And last but not least, Blog 2 Print is doing a fall promotion. If use the code fall4b2p to purchase a book before November 9, 2009 you will receive 20% off. They told me to share it with my friends and my friends, they are you!

I Wish

To my dear Jack and Kamden,

This life, it is short. It can be amazing and it can also knock you down and kick you in the nuts. You cannot control the knocks or the kicks but you are the captain of your own ship. You control how you react to the knocks and the kicks. No one else. You control where that ship takes you in life. You and only you. Always remember that.

In this life, I wish for you:

Love. Deep, unconditional, passionate love. May you find that special someone that was meant to walk beside you as your equal through this life.

Laughter. May you always find the humour in the situation and never take yourself or any situation too seriously. (Except when you put your Daddy and I into a retirment home, take that VERY seriously. Please?)



Passion. May you find that which engulfs your body and soul, makes you strive to be better and also provides for you and if applicable, your family. Not just a job but something that fufills you to your very core. (I am allowed to wish for my kids what I don't have, right?)

To know your heart. May you always be true to yourself and follow your heart wherever it may take you. Be confident in your decisions. Own them, good or bad, they are yours as are the consequences that come with them. Learn from your mistakes with no regrets.

Happiness. May you find true happiness. It's yours for the taking. If you follow your heart and your dreams, you will find it.



This is what I wish for you.

And also, while you are off doing all of that, call your Mom and Dad every now and then, okay?

Love Mommy

I've gone off nuts, it's official

If you are a regular reader (hi, y'all, you know how much I love you, right? M'wah) you know about my health issues. I have pretty much maxed on any help from the medical side of things. I am on hormones, which have helped immensely, however, the migraines that began the day before we left for Hawaii this past January have not budged. In fact, they love to pop up at the most inopportune moments, like smack dab in the middle of my Pilate's class a couple of days ago. Not to mention that my thyroid and adrenal glands could just up and go the way of my ovaries whenever they feel like it.

A friend mentioned (Hi Jackie!) a naturopath. What the hell I said, what have I got to lose?

So I went a week and half ago and I won't lie, parts of it had me going, are you serious?

For example, the Velcro straps that she put around my ankles, wrists and forehead that were connected to a small box with blinking lights that proceeded to tell her computer all kinds of things that normally would require extensive blood work. And then, and this had my mom laughing so hard she couldn't talk, to see what supplements would work well for me, she proceeded to place bottles of liquid on top of the box with blinking lights.

I know, I know, I should have an open mind but how, on God's green earth, does a bottle of liquid on top of a box tell her how my body will react to whatever is in the bottle?

And if this works so well, why haven't we abolished invasive blood tests?

Anyway, I didn't really go for that part of it, though I am taking the supplements the blinking box said would work and I feel good. What I went for the diet and nutrition part. I believe strongly that what I put in to my body has a huge impact on its productivity and well being. I have already learned that fitness goes a long way, surely improving on what I am eating will also help. And in fact, maybe I can even prevent further health problems such as a slacker thyroid. If I can, why wouldn't I?

She (the naturopath, we'll call her Shirley), put me on an elimination diet. That means that for three weeks I can't eat dairy (no surprise here, I have been lactose intolerant for years), sugar (I may have audibly gasped when she said that), wheat, eggs and peanuts. WHAT? No peanut butter and honey toast for breakfast? You are KILLING me slowly.

I love sugar. I love baking. I love my toast for breakfast. In no particular order.

That was a week and half ago. I honestly thought giving up sugar was going to put me in the loony bin. It hasn't. I am okay. I have some honey every now and then to keep me sane and I am good to go. What might surprise you (Hi Mom and Dad) is that I have not eaten chocolate since I can remember - likely the day before I started this diet, I have a short memory, what can I say. For me, this is an eternity. And I am still breathing. Wonders never cease.

What I would do though is cut off my left arm for a piece of bread. Slathered generously with peanut butter and jam, full sugar jam (if only I could be that much of a bad ass). Almond butter is good, but it's not peanut butter.

Today, armed with advice from several wheat avoiders, I hit up the health food store. Lo and behold! A whole array of flours that nary did see the stalk of a wheat plant. It was like I hit the mother load.

I bought a bread mix that while it contains some sugar meets the rest of the requirements. I baked it up the minute I got home.



The second it came out of the machine, I sliced a piece and slathered it with jam (sugar free).



It was good. And I finally feel full. Taking wheat out of my diet left very few carbs and I need me some carbs to feel full. It's a process. I am learning. And I feel great.

I'll let you know how this adventure turns out. Or Jay will in between visits with me in the loony bin.